Death Wish
Air date 2012
Written by Fiske Cahill
Other episodes by the author

Gasping for Air

Coming Soon!

 This should be a special episode because it's pretty long


Blue: Ah, the beach, the fresh air, the summer heat, the sun high in the sky and finally...

Red: YEAH!

Blue: Red, What are you doing?

Red: I'm digging for treasure, what to you think I'm doing?

Blue: Being a retard (Awkward Pause) anyway, you're never gonna find treasure.

Red: Oh Yeah, I detect a CHALLENGE.

Blue: Alright, you have 24 hours to find treasure and if you don't find it by then you'll have to... uh... pay all the money you owe me.

Red: And if I do find treasure I won't owe you any more money.

Blue: Alright.

Red: Let the challenge BEGIN!

(23 Hours and 59 Minutes and 45 Seconds Later)

Blue: Face it! You'll never win!

Red: I will not stop until that large timer you put up goes until zero (Shows large timer) or until I find treasure.

Blue: 10...9...8...7...6...5...

Red: Hey, I hit something...


Red: UH, it's just a lamp.


Red: Or is IT!


(Red somehow got a laptop and searches for the lamp)

Blue: How did you get wi-fi here?

Red: Ooooooooo, it's a golden lamp.

Blue: Well duh, didn't you see the label?

(Shows a label that says "this is a golden lamp")

Red: Oh, okay. Ah, ah, ah achooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(250 Miles Away)

Pink: Ah! What was that sound?

Red: Wow! That is one dusty lamp.

Red: (Rubs the lamp while singing:) Rubbing, rubbing, rubbing, rubbing, rubbing, rubbing (lamp glows) Oooooohhh, shiny.

Blue: What's happening? (A genie comes out of the lamp) Cool, it's genie, awesome...Wait, oh man now I won't get my money.

Genie: I am SUPER AWESOME GENIE MAN GUY PERSON THING YEAH! And I will both give you 3 wishes, but not each.

Blue: *coughs* Still a cheap ass

Red: Um, um, um oh, I wish for a lifetime supply of chips

Genie: Your wish is my command (Snaps fingers and the chips appear)

Red: Aw Sick! (Starts eating it)

Blue: Um, I wish for a million dollars!

Genie: Your wish is my command (Snaps fingers and the money appears)

Blue: I'm rich! Woohoo!

Genie: 1 Wish left.

Red: My turn!

Blue: No my turn!

Red: No, (Evil voice) MY TURN!

Blue: No way, And I'm am prepared to fight you for it. (Gets a sword from somewhere)

Red: So am I brotheren, wait what?

(Starts fighting to the death then Blue pins Red down on the ground)

Red: Don't do it!

Blue: I will.

Red: But, (Sounds like Darth Vader) Blue, I am your father.

Blue: Pfft, no you're not!

Red: But I am gonna beat you! Ha! (Continues fighting)

(Raccoon walks in hungover)

Raccoon: I wish I could quit drinking.

Genie: His wish is my command. (Snaps his finger and Raccoon doesn't drink anymore)


Blue: Hey Red, did you hear that?

Red: Hear what?

Blue: That he (Points at Raccoon) used our last wish.

Red: Shall we?

Blue: Hell Yeah!

Blue and Red: Charge!!!

Raccoon: Oh fu-

(Episode Ends)


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